


On the Rocks

by minkmix



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Humor, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, so appropriate today at 5F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-06
Updated: 2019-03-06
Packaged: 2019-11-12 20:45:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 720
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18018134
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minkmix/pseuds/minkmix
Summary: Winchesters live on ice!





	On the Rocks

"What are you crazy?"

"Or am I the most sane guy you know..."

Sam shook his head and shoved his freezing hands into his arm pits. Next town they hit he was buying some gloves. Insulated ones. And some of that thermal underwear and maybe one of those goofy looking Tibetan hats he always saw snow boarders wearing on TV. Ten electric blankets and maybe one of those jackets that made you look like some freaky version of the Michelin Man.

"Come on, it's not that far."

"You have no idea how thick that stuff is Dean." Sam tried blowing his fogging breath between his shaking closed hands.

"It'll be fine."

Sam looked out at the expanse of frozen water. Opaque whites and polar like blues, it gleamed and glittered under the warmthless sun that shone weak in the winter sky. He looked back at the trail of foot steps they had left along the shore behind them. Some helpful citizen from the small town had assured them you could get to the tiny island in the middle of the lake by foot. Sam wondered if the old guy had confused walking with swimming.

"We can just keep going down a ways, maybe there's some other way over there--"

"You wanna trudge through any more snow and freeze what's left of your ass off you go ahead and be my guest." Dean told him through chattering teeth.

Sam looked around again as if closer inspection would reveal a heated suspension bridge he'd missed.

His brother put his boot out on the ice and experimentally shifted his weight a little.

"Look," Dean reasoned. "What's the worse case scenario? I get half way out there, fall through and die an icy horrible death."

"Actually, the worst case scenario is my subsequent demise trying to save your stupid ass from your icy horrible death."

"Hey, at least we wouldn't be standing around here anymore. It's like being on... on um.... something really freakin' lamely cold."

"Like Pluto?" Sam helpfully offered.

"Sure," He glanced over at him in semi digust. "Like Pluto."

Dean took a deep breath and stepped out onto the lake.

Sam felt his jaw tense when he heard the soft groan and dull crack of the ice. He anxiously watched as his brother took several cautious steps before he stopped and turned around triumphantly.

"See? No problem." He smiled. "Didn't I tell you there was nothin' to worry abou-- **ah!** "

Sam's heart stuttered for a moment when he thought for sure the next thing he'd see would be a dark jagged hole seeping up the near frozen murky lake water. The brief frantic glimpses of a hand splashing before it disappeared down into the depths. The certain horrible silence that would follow.

But instead, the ice was just fine.

Just a tad slippery.

Flat on his back, Dean breathed a few choice phrases. It didn't help matters when after the second and third attempts to get up landed him exactly and ungracefully right back where he had started.

"God damn it Sam, are you gonna stand there laughin' all day or fuckin' gimme a hand!" Dean hissed. "This shit is freezing!"

"That shit is ice." Sam agreed while trying to catch his breath. "It's kinda its nature."

A silent glare of warning made him concede to take some action. Keeping his laughter under control to better maintain balance, he took his own wavering step onto the lake and felt his boot slide a little across the slick surface. Adequately forewarned of the danger, he confidently performed a skate type walk towards his brother who was trying unsuccessfully to get to his feet.

Sam moved to offer him a hand as requested.

And promptly landed hard on his ass.

"Sam?"

His older brother had momentarily given up and was laying on his back again.

"What?"

"There are things on my body that no man should ever feel go numb."

Jarred and having narrowly avoided biting his tongue off, Sam quickly felt the numbing cold horrible seep of water spread across the seat of his jeans. In fact in no time at all, it had gone right through his boxer shorts. The bone chilling wind choose that exact moment to pick up.

"Not so funny now, is it?" Dean asked.

"No, not really."

**Author's Note:**

> _my lake is frozen. again. i kinda dig how birds just sit on it. while i stand on it._


End file.
